It's just you
I am dismissed
It's a bother
I am a bother
Ill chosen words
Cut down to my darkest self
I am a burden
Friday, April 19, 2013
As the following days turn into weeks we settle into a rhythm, alternating where we sleep, though more often than not we end up at my place. Edward starts his new job, thriving in his environment. We cook and clean together, spend our evenings quietly at home with Brutus. We visit with Rose and Emmett a few times, and even have dinner at Edward's parents' place – something that, despite Elizabeth's apology and welcome, still has me nervous, though as it turns out, Edward Sr. is very much like his son, and I'm left feeling truly a part of Edward's family.
All in all, I feel happier than I ever recall being, and I yearn for more, though I'm unsure how to broach the subject with Edward. The more I think about it, the more I'm certain about us – about having a future together – and I want to cement that somehow. Just how is where I'm stumped. I know that the idea of us each having an apartment is becoming more and more ludicrous, considering we're always at one place or the other anyway. But with Edward, I start to feel that I need more than just living with him, something that I have somewhat of a hard time coming to terms with, because with Liam I never felt that need. Just sharing home and bed together had been enough with him, but now...
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Friday, April 12, 2013
The next morning, I almost oversleep, something I rarely do. Somehow, I've managed to turn off the alarm clock without realizing it, and it's only thanks to Brutus nuzzling my face that I wake up with just enough time to shower before heading out. Edward, who's equally groggy and slightly disoriented by the sudden waking and shock of running late, promises to make breakfast and coffee and drop it by the store after locking up my apartment for me, leaving me free to hurry out the door.
I make it to the shop with only two minutes to spare, so I have to rush through my usual opening routine. It unsettles me, as it always does the few times this has happened in the past, but I try to deal with it as best I can. At least I can look forward to a break as soon as Edward shows up, which he does about an hour after I've opened. He smiles, nodding at the customer who's paying for a couple of frames. As soon as she leaves, I sink back on the stool behind the counter, groaning. Edward glances around the store, then places the bag he brought with him on the counter before stepping around it to hug me.
Friday, April 5, 2013
The elevator ride to my floor feels like it takes forever. The temptation to stop by his place is strong, but I'm convinced that he won't want to see me. I know he's not working today, and it's the only explanation I can think of. When I get to my door though, I feel a fluttering of hope at the sight of a post it stuck on the doorknob.
come downstairs? Dinner's waiting.
Slumping against my door I let out a shaky laugh as I run my fingers through my hair. If he says dinner's waiting, then things can't be as bad as I'd feared. With trembling hands I hurry to open my door so I can change into something more comfortable before heading down.
Friday, March 29, 2013
A tickling sensation wakes me the next morning, and it takes me a second to realize it's Edward's fingers trailing back and forth along my side. With a hum, I stretch as I roll onto my back and open my eyes in search of him. He's propped up on his side, watching me with a content look on his face. His smile widens when his gaze meets mine.
“Morning, sleepyhead. Guess I tired you out pretty good, huh?” He chuckles and his smile turns into a smirk as I narrow my eyes and huff.
“How long have you been awake?” I ask, rolling onto my side to face him.
He wrinkles his nose and laughs. “Fine, you caught me. I've only been awake for a couple of minutes, myself.”
“That's what I thought,” I mumble as I pull him closer for a kiss. “Morning, by the way,” I whisper against his lips.
Friday, March 22, 2013
I hurry home, anxious to hop in the shower and get ready for my date with Edward. It feels as if my heart and stomach both flip several times as I get ready. I even shave and put on a little aftershave before doing my hair. When I've satisfied myself there's nothing more to do, I walk over to my closet and stare inside it.
Edward had asked me to wear a suit. I own several, but I'm finding it hard to make up my mind. In the end, I decide to go with the one Esme says she loves most: my dark blue, narrow pinstripe suit, with powder blue shirt. I waffle for a minute on whether to put on a tie, too, but then I remember his note saying how much he wants to see me in a suit and I figure I might as well go all in.
Grabbing my favorite blue and silver tie, I quickly get dressed and am just putting on my cufflinks when the doorbell rings. A glance at the clock tells me it's seven on the dot, and I feel my face flushing when I realize how long it's taken me to get this far, and I haven’t even put socks and shoes on.